Why Do I Still Wear Nappies?

You may wear nappies because they help you stay comfortable, clean and safe. Some children use toilets, some use nappies, and some use both. None of those choices makes a child bad.

Key points

Your body is not doing something wrong.
Grown-ups often teach children to use toilets because that is what most people expect.
You can ask questions about your nappies and tell a trusted grown-up if a change hurts, if your skin is sore or if you want more privacy.

Why this can happen

Your body is not doing something wrong. Wee and poo are ordinary things every human body makes.

Grown-ups often teach children to use toilets because that is what most people expect. But a nappy is also a real way to look after your body.

What you can do

You can ask questions about your nappies and tell a trusted grown-up if a change hurts, if your skin is sore or if you want more privacy.

You are allowed to have feelings about toilets and nappies. A kind adult should listen.

Tell a trusted adult when you need a change.
Say if a product feels tight, wet, itchy or painful.
Ask for privacy.
Tell someone if another person teases or scares you.

The important thing is that you are cared for, listened to and safe. A toilet is one tool and a nappy is another. You are not worse because one of them works better for you.

When to tell an adult

A child should always tell a trusted adult about pain, blood, bullying, unsafe touching or anything that feels wrong.

Information for parents and carers

Research on dignity-protective continence care locates dignity in autonomy, privacy, respect, trust and control over care rather than in toilet use alone.

The wider principle

The wider case is set out in Beyond the Toilet: Toilet Use, Non-Toilet Use and Bodily Freedom. Its central point is that toilet use is a learned body-management system, not a biological or moral requirement.

A closely related explanation is available in Toilet Use, Non-Toilet Use, and Bodily Autonomy.

Conclusion

Your body is not bad, and wearing a nappy does not decide how clever, brave or grown-up you are. Ask for the care and privacy you need, and tell a trusted adult when something hurts or feels unsafe.

Scribe